Cadaver

Well, this is nice getting to type our journals.

Life is a special thing and it should be lived to the fullest. Some people don't do that and they end up missing out on a lot of great times. I don't want to be like that, I want to live and experience all things worth doing. When I die, as is inevitable, I want my last minutes spent remembering all the good I have done, not what I have left undone. I want it to be peaceful, as a natural death not one of pain and suffering. I want to close my eyes for that final time knowing that I have achieved at least half of what I aimed to. When I reopen my eyes not on earth but in heaven, or wherever it is I end up, I wish to be happy, at peace, and to feel light as if a weight has lifted off my shoulders. This would be my nirvana.

At the same time as I am experiencing complete and utter joy I am mindful that my friends and family would be in a state of mourning. It is not to say that I won't miss them, as I am sure I will, but it is true that they must carry on. As for my disposal, funeral, cremation, or science, I do not know. My mother wishes to be cremated but if I can stand to leave my family with my ashes I am not sure. If I donated my body to science my family would have no way of "visiting" me and easing some of the pain. True, if they did "visit" they'd just be talking to decomposed bone and muscle, but it's the idea that counts.
A funeral can be a weary occasion yet one for the mourners to comfort themselves. They always seemed like uncomfortable situations to me. If I were to die before I made a will I suppose my family would have a traditional burial, which would be fine but not something I myself would have attended if I were alive. I'm not sure how I'd ideally like to be disposed of but as long as I am remembered my preference is none.